Walking Through Hallowed Halls

Tomorrow is Halloween and Reformation Day. As a child the latter event holds actively vivid memories, but for most kids the first seems more significantly relevant. And, as the Oldies play in this local coffee shop, I am reminded that I had a kindly different childhood, and love to think back on all the silly moments that make up my past.
Sure, I have my share of Freudian parental struggles stored in my psyche, but I am free to recall so many little moments from two to sixteen. Today, I found myself at sixteen in khakis and a tucked in shirt with uncomfortable shoes I once thought cute. I walked through the park with Sundae to stumble into a paved road to my past. There, I derailed my quiet exterior into something reminiscent.
Leaping from anxious to smudging a smile across my cheeks as I remembered the once roamed the halls of BLS. I remembered all those little moments trailing from my locker into the entrance of Mr. Hen's chemistry class. Such thoughts like, "Are my stockings ripping again? Will Dan Cox ask me out? Oh holy crap, I forgot to work on those mole equations! Maybe Katie Sharkey will help me get a few free answers?" These little inner dialogues accompanied my teen years, and I can now look back to understand that my little moments of crisis turned into the comedy that I needed on this too serious of a day. Best, today isn't that serious and that's what's bugging me.
Lately, I can see that I am more than stuck in a life with dwindled responsibilities. I have work, some friend, and a few family responsibilities, but nothing much waits for me to respond when I hang up my coat in my neat little apartment each night. I can awake to call into work for a partial day off, and it barely seems to matter. I can freely take my chubby puppy to the park to soak in some old memories without a plan. And, I can find myself craving my old home life when I pour a cup of coffee and eat dinner by myself once more. I miss the little tensions that were accompanied with good company.
This ginger peach tea is delicious, but I guarantee you that I won't be thinking about it when I am feeling lonely, walking in the park on a beautiful day like today. I won't sit around thinking about the time in my life when it was so quiet that I spent hours online looking for noise in music. But, will I? As I turned the paved corner in the park, I had to admit that all my little memories of childhood seem to fit in niches that most people would not notice. It's like finding those old hidden closets that seemed to serve no purpose, but like to make up fantasies for hidden worlds lying behind its sealed doors.
It's comforting to know that today will one day matter. It could be the source of a long awaited smile or deep breath. Something in this time that just feels like roaming will become something hallowed like a name. It will be marked as a time in my life, and I am glad to call it my own.